YWCA Week Without Violence on October, 2020: Baby was born without father? custody?
YWCA Week Without Violence 2020. YWCA Week Without Violence™ - YWCA USA The YWCA Week Without Violence
Now it depends...were you married to the father of your child? If not, you should have sole custody. Have your lawyer go to court to have your sole custody confirmed...have your lawyer point out that your ex is out on bail for domestic violence...and ask for supervised visitation and child support to be set up. If you were married, you two will automatically have joint custody and he can give his name to the child....if you two aren't married, you give your own name to the baby. You need a very good lawyer...make sure you have one. As for what his chances are, it depends on the skill of your lawyer, his lawyer, and whether the judge is a father's rights advocate. It will help you if your ex gets convicted. Good luck and God bless.
Addendum: "Supervised visitation" can be dicey...a man in the U.S. murdered his child during supervised visitation at a YWCA...shot the kid dead before killing himself. You need to be very careful for both yourself and your kids.
Why wasn't there a shelter for me when I was a victim of non-self-defense violence from an ex-girlfriend?
There are actually many:
California, Lancaster - Valley Oasis Family Violence Shelter
This is one of the extremely few shelters in the entire US which offer help to victims without discriminating based on gender. Their 24-hour crisis line number: (805)945-6736.
Claudia Dias, director of "Changing Courses" in North Highlands, a suburb of Sacramento California, has anger management groups for both men and women, and works with women who are abusive to their partners. Their phone number is (916) 332-5056.
California, San Diego County
The Domestic Violence Hotline 1-888-305-SAFE (7233) is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and provides referrals to a variety of services such as: Domestic Violence shelter bed availability, Counseling services, Support Group services, Emergency Food and Clothing, Legal services, Anti-Stalking information, and other available community resources. I called and talked with an employee there, and they provide services for everyone -- men, women, straight or gay. They also told me that there is a shelter for gay men and lesbian women there (call 619-692-2077) and the YWCA has counseling services for men that are abused (call 619-270-4504). Let me know what kind of experiences you have with these services, please.
The Florida Men's Resource Center has a list of resources for men in Florida. Women and children are "welcome also", according to the web page. The Florida Men's Resource is a SAFE Affiliate.
Here are some resources if you're in Florida. These resources said that they help battered men:
SHELTERS (407 area code)
Coalition for the Homeless: 426-1250
Crossroads Mission: 843-5269
Central Care Mission: 299-6146
Anthony House: 383-5577
Salvation Army 423-8581
Fresh Start Project 422-9781
COUNSELING (407 area code)
Cornerstone Institute: Bruce Stoakley 830-8808
Spouse Abuse Outreach Ctr. 895-6099
Christian Service Center 425-2523
The Ogeechee Judicial Circuit Domestic Violence Shelter offers services to both men and women. Men do not stay at our shelter; however, they are able to provide shelter in a safe place for them at another location in the community. They have advocated for several male victims of domestic violence in the past three years of our existence (as of 1998). (912) 764-4605 crisis line
The Partnership Against Domestic Violence
1475 Peachtree St.
Atlanta, GA 30309
ADDITIONAL PHONE NUMBERS: crisis line: 404/873-1766 (see locations for local office numbers)
HOURS/DAYS: 9:00 am to 5:30 pm MON - FRI; 24 hour crisis line
shelter and services for abused women and their children
referral services for battered men, batterers' program, program for women charged with assault
24 hour crisis line
temporary protective orders
support groups, counseling - men, women, children
child/spouse abuse prevention/education
relocation assistance for current clients only
There is a group trying to set up services for heterosexual abused men. See .
The Battered Men's Helpline reports that Battered Men's support groups are starting up in Southern and Central Maine. Call their toll free number 1-877-643-1120 Access Code # 0757 for meeting times and locations. If you who are interested in helping and/or offering financial support, please call 207-683-2515. re is a group trying to set up services for heterosexual abused men. P.O. Box 252, Harmony, Maine 04942. E-mail email@example.com.
Michigan S.A.F.E. Hotline
The SAFE group in Michigan has set up a national hotline for battered men and lesbian women to call: (616)941-0825. Requests for help can be written to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Cumberland Heights is an alcohol and drug treatment center with a court services component. The court services program offers many different classes for court-ordered clients, and one of them is domestic violence classes. The classes are for men and women who have been arrested for domestic violence charges AND who have substance abuse issues. Substance abuse issues ranges from addiction to using during the incident that got them arrested. Not all have serious problems with alcohol or drugs. They do not offer victims services; all of those are referred to local shelters. The program is a 6 month program and the clients meet one time weekly. If someone needs information on any of these services, the number is 1-800-707-8882.
Cumberland Heights also seems to have a program for women perpetrators of violence. Contact the program coordinator, karen Bybee, at (615)353-4398.
The Women's Shelter (hotline number 817-460-5566) will help battered men. To make a counseling appointment, call (817)548-0583. I have heard of at least one man receiving services here.
Texas, Ft. Worth
The Women's Haven, hotline number: (817)535-6464. They will help battered men.
The Family Place, (212)941-1991, will offer help to battered men.
Apparently, the Center for Battered Women in Snohomish County has a twenty four hour crisis line for victims of domestic violence. Advocates are trained to talk to callers of all genders and sexual preferences providing safety planning, advocacy based counseling and community resource referral. The phone number is (425)252-2873. (7/6/98)
The Washington State Domestic Violence Hotline can be reached toll-free at 800-562-6025. Their URL is , and the email is email@example.com. Their website is almost completely in gender-neutral language, and their mandate is inclusive of all abuse victims (and possibly perpetrators as well). [MenWeb editor's note: My own opinion is that the Hotline uses gender-neutral language to describe, exclusively, a woman's experience. See The Gender-Neutral Joke. When I called, they named only one center that served men, in Seattle, and suggested that men call the National DV Hotline. Their page "What is Domestic Violence" focuses on the gender-polarizing"Duluth Model," defining domestic violence in terms of men asserting male privilege over men.]
If you live in Australia, see the list of Australian hotlines and information for men that are abused. Also see here for more Australian hotlines.
Apparently, the university there is providing a hotline for abused men, but I haven't found out the phone number for it yet. I'll let you know as soon as I do.
The Easton Alliance for the Prevention of Family Violence is the first Canadian family violence prevention agency and charity for abused men. It is also perhaps the first organization of its kind in the world. You can contact them by phone: (416)691-8269, fax: (416)691-1113, mail: 97 Main Street, Toronto ON Canada M4E 2V6, and e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org. They offer a support group, referrals, and more.
Canada, Victoria BC
The Victoria Men's Centre, has information and a discussion circle for men, and makes referrals to counselling and other services. There's also another group starting, called the "Well Society", which is setting up a retreat center for men, due to be open in a couple of months. Their phone recording line is at (250) 370-4636, and address is Box 8082, Victoria, B.C. V8W 3R7.
AMEN, in Dublin, opened in December 1997 and heard from over 3,000 men and their families in the first year. They offer a confidential advice line for Men in violent relationships. Read Amen's article "The Male Victim" on MenWeb.
Men's Advice Line & Enquiries (M.A.L.E.)
Monday & Wednesday 9AM to Midnight
(answer machine all other times)
Write to: Les Davidson
PO Box 402, Sutton, Surrey, SM1 3TG
"Information for and about Male Victims of Domestic Violence"
The Resource Center in Aberdeen, SD recently changed its name, but hasn't yet updated its web page. Don't let the old name, Resource Center for Women discourage you! I've spoken with them and they provide counseling for men, may start a men's support group soon, and provide ad hoc sheltering for battered men who've had to leave their homes. (Holzman)